I’m Baaaack!!

Ok so it feels like forever since I last posted. I did begin a post Sept. 1st, but didn’t finish it. Soooo – I’m finishing now and will throw in some headers here & there to help you along the timeline of this (kinda long) post. Enjoy!

SEPTEMBER 1st, 2019

Ohhhhh…
Back To School
Back To School
To Prove To Dad That I’m Not A Fool
I’ve Got My Lunch Packed Up,
My Boots Tied Tight,
I Hope I Don’t Get In A Fight
Ohhhh…
Back To School
Back To School
Back To School...”

Remember that catchy Adam Sandler tune from his hilarious take on an adult re-doing all 12 grades of school, Billy Madison. Could you imagine hitting the do-over button on school. Some of that idea sounds fab but most of it terrifying.

For many of us, the children have returned to school and the word “schedule” has true meaning again. Of course we all love our children and the extra time we have with them during the summer but I’d be lying if I haven’t enjoyed the silence during the hours of 8am-3:30pm. For me, the schedule part is still a work in progress seeing as I decided to go under the knife for “phase 2″ reconstruction 4 days after the girls returned to school. Maybe not perfect timing, but when is the perfect time? I could put it off for weeks, months, years, or get it done the first available date possible. So, yep, that’s what I did! My school of thought has always been get ‘er done! No sense waiting if it’s not necessary…right?

During those 4 days between the girls going back to school and my surgery, I managed to regret my decision more & more each day closer to surgery day. I was dreading being laid up again, dreading the pain, dreading the helplessness…you name it, I was dreading it. I had just spent 6 weeks feeling human again! BUT “Phase 2” surgery was on the books and I wasn’t turning back.

Surgery was Monday, August 26th. I spent the first full week of the girls being in school enjoying pain Meds and binge watching Working Moms on Netflix. (Great show & the title doesn’t do it justice). The back to school pics plastered all over social media have been enjoyable for me and a tad redundant? Many “I cant believe little Susie or Joey are this big already” posts were in my FB and INSTA feeds. Well…believe it, because time is a flying by and we don’t get to slow it down. The kids are growing, the grey hairs are multiplying and against our will, time is flying.

With that being said, it’s been a while since I posted in general, let alone to educate. To provide details of where I am in this cancer chapter of life in hopes it can help someone out there in the same mess. Since you’ve asked yourself a few times why & what’s this “phase 2” all about, I’ll put my teacher hat on and educate. Don’t forget to share this blog or at least your new found education on all things pre & post breast cancer to other ladies that may be going through this ordeal and/or trying to make decisions on what the best choice is for them.

Let’s take a quick walk down memory lane….My surgical choice back in December 2018 was double mastectomy with immediate Deip Flap reconstruction. The long & short in laymen’s terms is that my docs took my baby pouch that didn’t want to go away and put it to good use in my chest. Lucky for me, my gut wasn’t large enough to fill the E-cup sized space that was left behind post-mastectomy. Therefore, when everything settled in & chemo ended it was time to discuss the next step for fine-tuning my breasts aka “phase 2”.

There was no need to bring the “girls” back to pre-cancer status in my mind but the goal is to look and feel as close to fabulous as possible in my own skin again (and bra…and bathing suit, tank top, spaghetti strap dress, etc).

For me, phase 2 included a very small implant and fat grafting. IMPLANT?!? What?!? Why would I get an implant when I chose the DIEP flap route to avoid implants? Well, the answer is because doc recommended it and I agreed that it would solve the problem of filling the extra space needed to make em nice and reminiscent of my 18 year old self?? The implant was placed under the “flap” and fat grafting was completed as well. Fat grafting is when a machine is used to turn fat cells into a liquid form to then be injected elsewhere. Translation – liposuction of one area of fat cells was moved to an area in need of fat (aka, my chest). Between the DIEP flap & grafting we’ll reach as close to perfection as we can, but may take a couple more sessions. The last phase will be tattooing. We’ll touch on that a little later.

September 18, 2019

Gina leaves for her FIRST sleep-away camp. This is their 6th grade trip that’s a combo of science, religion & bonding. Gina is our anxiety kid and was nervous about camp at the start of school. The nervousness progressed quickly to excitement and by the time she returned she was asking to go to 2 different camps next summer. I’m so incredibly proud of her and how she’s learning to control her moments of anxiety/nervousness on her own. She’s a smart kid that analyzes the fears in life a bit more than an 11 year old girl should, but she’s come such a long way in her ability to recognize that we must experience life and not be fearful of it. Maybe my cancer battle has helped her see that scary stuff doesn’t always need to be scary. The trip was just a few days and I was the lucky one that got to pick up her and a few friends right off the bus. We went back to the house and sat around the kitchen table laughing at camp stories. 6th graders are definitely “tweens” and their story-telling was quite comical!

September 20, 2019

Our first born turns 17! It truly is hard to believe how fast those years have gone. Miss Maria has grown into a beautiful young lady whom we’re very proud of! The bday weekend consisted of friends friends and more friends. Friday night football with a “space” theme. The game had a long rain delayed where 1/2 of the crowd left, yet Maria stayed & watched the boyfriend help Watterson get another W. Saturday was filled with working the volleyball scoring table and playing a couple CYO games, followed by a trip to “otherworld museum” which appeared to be rather cool & trippy. She finished the weekend Sunday with…wait for it…a concert! Surprise, surprise, the child is a concert queen. She was so busy all weekend we didn’t get a chance to sing happy birthday and watch her blow out 17 candles. I suppose we should get used to it since next year = adulthood and she’ll be on her own before long. ?

September 22, 2019

4 weeks post-op and am feeling great. The pain was a bit rough the first week, but nothing near what I felt after my first surgery. I’m very pleased with the results thus far and how everything is settling. It’s actually quite amazing what modern science can do. Im growing rather fond of my surgeons artistry creating my new “girls”. I returned to the gym just short of week 2 post-op and will have 3 weeks of consistent training & Pilates under my belt in hopes of building some strength before my hip replacement this coming Friday (9-27-19).

Yes – you read that correctly – I’m getting a new hip! WOOHOO! This girl is sick of pain and will be one step closer to being (my version) of pain free. My left hip was replaced almost 6 years ago and I had no desire to allow my right hip to get as bad as the left did before it collapsed and was replaced as my 40th birthday present. I’ll save you the gory details of those fun-filled pain days. Needless to say I’m looking forward to crossing this off the to-do list in time for a few long weekend vaca’s coming up the next few months. The most anticipated one being a girls trip with 14 of my college pals to NYC mid December. Me & my new hip are going to love every second of walking around that city during the holiday season.

September 25th – Back to the breast cancer update:

I am (and have been since 12-10-18) cancer free. Chemo is over and most of the effects are gone except for a little chemo brain & neuropathy, which is nerve damage that has caused numbness to the fingertips. This is a common side-effect to the type of chemo I had & it’s quite annoying. I hope it fades over time as it should.

Otherwise I’m feeling great. I feel like me again. My hair is growing like wildfire. My eyelashes are fantabulously long and eyebrows also lookin lush. The only complaints I have at the moment would be scar related. My hip to hip scar is kinda wicked, but it will fade over time, so I’m trying not to dwell on it.

I am still receiving a monthly shot in the gut and take daily meds that are meant to prevent the return of the cancer and shut down the ovaries. Surprisingly enough, I have not really felt bad from the meds. The exercise & healthy eating the hubs and I have been doing together must be making a difference in the effects of the meds. I truly do feel good these days.

In the grand scheme of life, I have no major complaints! I’m so glad the brunt of all this is reaching an end and I can go about life putting cancer in the past.