So I’m at the office and my phone gets a notification from ADT. This is what occurs when the doorbell cam (aka Ring) goes off at the house. I usually ignore it if I’m working because I can go back and see clips later if needed. It serves its purpose when food or packages are being delivered, when the boyfriend (Maria’s, not mine;) is stopping by ORRRR your 9 year old wants to get your attention at work while she’s HOME ON THE FRONT PORCH! What?!? I’m at the office. I just finished a meeting and my phone is getting buzzed with notifications of our doorbell so the girls can ask me a question. I must admit it’s creative, funny, and 100% my fault. Yep, I made the mistake of talking to Julia through the speaker from my phone while I was at the office. I was cracking up watching her in this little white VW bug trying to get it to move. I opened Pandora’s box and she ran with it for sure. Apparently this is the newest way to communicate these days. Video below for your morning entertainment:)https://ama506.p3cdn1.secureserver.net/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/img_7575.mov
It’s been months since my last post and my-oh-my has there been a lot that’s occurred in life for all of us. One would think with all the “extra time” on my hands you’d all be sick of hearing from me by now…but somehow time has flown and here I am, finally writing.
This blog was started due to a cancer diagnosis. It has served as both therapy and hopefully lent a helping hand to others traveling down the same path. It’s evolved into a place to vent as well as a placeholder for me to simply document life. Even as I type now it’s a bit therapeutic, a place for me to share feelings and emotions behind the curtain of the inter-webs. The problem now is WHERE IN THE WORLD DO I START!?! I’ve started writing this post many weeks ago and life literally had offered so much to talk about it’s hard to know where to begin. Today I am bound and determined to STOP editing and hit the damn post button once and for all. I think I’ve procrastinated for the sheer fact that I don’t know where to start without rambling on forever.
I’ll start with cancer since it’s where it all began. Friday was another of my monthly gut injections and quarterly oncology appointments. I’m weeks from the 1 year anniversary of finishing chemo and am 10+ injections into a lifetime of maintenance.
The first time I had to go to my oncologist office since COVID lockdown was such a different experience. As I approached the door I was greeted by a masked nurse directing me to my 6 foot distance waiting spot. My temp was taken, I was asked the 3 COVID questions, then given a green sticker of clearance if I answered correctly and didn’t have a fever. I was then allowed to walk inside. I approach the plexiglass encased check-in desk and am on to the next step. As I look around I notice the coffee area is closed, the vending machines are emptied, the magazines are gone and of course 95% of the folks inside are masked. Next stop is lab for blood draw. Another newly encased plexiglass area with masked nurses. I felt odd picking up the pen to write my name on the patient list. My blood is drawn and next up is my chat with doc. The majority of our conversation is COVID, our kids, and what her senior missed during her last month in High school. Thankfully, there’s not much to discuss in terms of my health, except when to schedule the removal of my ovaries which will let me stop the monthly injections.
I air-hug doc and am off to the fun part. While I sit to wait for them to call my name, I look around at the patients waiting. There were less than usual which is interesting because cancer doesn’t have a timeline nor does it know COVID is lurking, therefore, I assumed I’d see the same busy place as the last year. I get my injection, which takes 2 minutes and I’m out of there until next month.
I’m so thankful I didn’t have treatment during this time and really feel for those that are having to ward off a life threatening illness while fighting a life threatening disease.
Speaking of COVID ~ WTF! This thing has rocked our world and it seems the end may be near, but who knows. I never would have thought during my entire life I’d be forced to stay home for months. This Quarantine stuff is definitely not made for the social folks of the world. I’ve actually named “it” Quarantina (even before SNL stole my thunder). I can’t decide if Quarantina is just the bitch that wreaked havoc in our country or my alter ego during lockdown…lets go with the first one. I can tell you one thing – my children have finally realized that I can turn any word or statement into a song! I tend to do it on the daily. One of the Fan faves was…
“Don’t cry for me Quarantina
The truth is I never loved you
All through these wild days
A mad existence
I kept my promise
And kept our distance”
Thank you Madonna for the ease of making a parody. 
To be honest, Quarantina hasn’t treated us to bad over-all. The girls have gotten along better than expected. They did well working independently Homeschooling, which is a very good thing because I’m not a teacher in any way, shape, or form. The best homeschooling moment was week 1, day 3, when Gina asked me for help on a SPANISH assignment. Ummm, yeah, I’m Mexican but “yo no hable espanol”
We started off Quarantine ambitious, like many I’d assume. We were working out, we played cards, did puzzles and actually created our art room and painted a mural. 
Quite a few things happened while Quarantina was here. We “celebrated” our 20th Anniversary home with the kids. 
We went on walks, had cooking contests, and painted quite a bit
and of course we ZOOMED,zoomed, and zoomed some more. Between family, friends and clients I’m almost zoomed out! We made tic-toks (hope the links below work), watched Tiger King and MANY other binge worthy shows.
qaw
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As time went on we became a bit more lenient with our quarantining. Thankfully having my own office I was able to still go to work and not work from home every day. The hubs was always going to work since his business is also “essential” and the kids have had a few play dates.
As sports, school and basically life as we know it was coming to a hault, I was reflecting on the last year or so. I wondered how it would be if my dad was experiencing these times. Would he have gotten sick? Would he have even followed the guidelines or would he be 100% confused. My guess is potentially all of the above. I think back to the terrible loss of my cousin Donny in January. I am thankful that if such tragedy was going to hit our family it happened when he could receive a proper funeral. Sadly, I lost a client to COVID. She was 60 and just lost her husband 2 months prior. She and many others that passed during this time did not get the proper goodbye that they deserved for themselves and most importantly their family.
These times are something I never thought I’d experience in my lifetime. Wearing masks, ? going through hand sanitizer like water, hoping you don’t run out of toilet paper before you turn paper towels into peepee towels…Seeing X marks the spot for where to stand when waiting to check out of stores or even to get into them. 
Then, as the country starts to slowly open up again – all hell breaks loose with the wrongful death of George Floyd. This was the tipping point of racial inequality and police brutality. All of which should have been gone years ago.
It’s beyond sad to think that in 2020 we have taken so many steps backwards. I feel like I’m in the twilight zone or a novel from the first round of 20’s. They say history repeats itself, well that sure does seem apparent now. Except what’s occurring in our world now is as if we’ve taken 5 decades of historical events and combined them into 6 months. The economy is suffering, unemployment rates are through the roof, protesting went from peaceful to riots to peaceful again, a virus is taking lives and keeping us away from others, city curfews are being set nightly…all in the tail end of a mandatory quarantine.
If you would have told me one year ago when I was wrapping up chemo that all of the above would be occurring at the turn of the decade – I’d of course call you nuts and tell you to write a fiction novel and call me when it’s published!
Of course all of what I’ve written isn’t news to you – we’re ALL living in the middle of these historical times and quite frankly I’m nervous for what’s to come. Our oldest will be off to college & on her own in a year. The protesting had a rough start when rioting occurred nationwide. It drowned out the voices for change a bit, and increased debates across social media. Thankfully, the violence stopped and the message can be heard loud and clear.
It’s truly upsetting to see my children witness the inequities that still exist when the hope was they’d only read about it in history books. My children have been raised to not see color in another human, yet the human divide and racism that is breading within some is in front of them in plain sight.
I took my girls downtown to the protesting in front of the state host yesterday. It was a beautiful day and I’m so glad we could experience it together. For my daughters to see that not only do we fight for what we believe in with our words, but also our actions. As we were walking back to the van, Julia (youngest) and I were holding hands and talking about this moment in time. Her statement to me was so simple and pure “this shouldn’t have to happen”. Shes exactly right, nobody on earth should be treated differently EVER because of the color of their skin. Such a simple statement that appears to be so complex in reality. The art that we saw on the boards that were used to protect businesses during when the protests turned to violence are such amazing works of art documenting the emotions felt at the moment in time. I hope when the dust settles and the boards come off, they are kept in a monument or placed around columbus to remember the voices against injustice.
The most exciting part of our afternoon was Maria registering to vote! She’ll be 18 in three months and can make her mark in this world by casting her first vote this November.
With that I’ll bid you all a good day and I hope your hearts are full of “PEACE AND LOVE”
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